Sunday, July 16, 2017

The Peculiar Gambler

                   The Peculiar Gambler.
                     by : Tanoko Prawira

     college life almost over, nah kidding it takes another 2 semesters until my graduation (if i don't do some stupid things that maybe ruining my 4years college time)  Some things popped on my head, what is it like when you're gonna free falling into the real life. Is it hard? or is it easier than college Bullshit. Honestly, as long as i lived until now, there's so much gambling on my life for example : when i got accepted on University, back then i don't even know what major i should choose, but i had a chance to choose my current major, i took it...and i got it, i don't know people usually said that i was lucky, or maybe i could read the situation on a quick response. Just like the time when i told Imel (it's what she wanted to called by me) that i love her, it's a totally biggest gambling on my life because for the last two weeks, she was drifting away from me. The thing is, i'm getting older...geez man, can at least i stop growing up? because i do like my teenage life, being an adult makes me worried.
"what if i can't find a job?"
"what if i can't have a vacation?"
"what happen if the workplace isn't a good place for me?"
well, i don't like sitting in a front of computer desk, for a long time typing something. While There's so much things i could do on the outside. All of My closest friend told me that being a journalist is a good job for me, especially those kind of journalist that walkin' everywhere to find some news. But my body has it own limits, right?
being a musician? it's good if my bands getting famous, but can someone guarantee that my band will always be known by people? i don't think so.And my parents always said that don't even find your living by your hobby, because in the end you'll hate your own hobby. maybe they're right.  So in order for being an organized man, i make some planning on my life. The things i liked besides music, is food and all kinds of soda. Maybe i'll find a job on soda company, because somehow i felt that it's a nice work for me, getting involved on soda's brewing. and i don't like being a librarian, even it's my current major. gonna work my ass up, on that company, when i'm getting much money, i'll open my own business. such as record label, or my own brand of food, then getting married with someone i love, and live happy for the rest of my life.
someone said to me that it's better to have a small business than worked on big company for a long time, because when you have your own business, you're the boss no matter how bad the business is, you know what? those person know already had his own house because he's a hard-working businessman. I'm a simple man, gambling is one of my favorite stuff to do, and i have my own American dream, i want to make my parents proud, and my enemies jealous. And my biggest desire is, i wanna make my bunny happy, and treat her right, showing her that she's really special on my eyes. because that's the fact. Maybe i used to be a jerk back then, or even a spoiled kid. but life taught me many things. I know what is the real definition of "sense of belonging" when i started to buy many stuff by myself and i'm grateful for her presence, because   second chance may not be appear twice. I hope she's not gonna leave me, or disappointing me, because something on her makes me falling in love again and again Everytime i looked her in the eyes. I just wanna take care of her on the right way. protect her with all my fist. Cause Anyone who's messing my girl is messing with me too. and, make her smile everyday. God always have a plan for me, but in the meantime, I'll make every moment with her memorable and special. Because, I really appreciated all of my time with her and i promise d that i'm not going anywhere, cause no matter hard the situation i'll choose to stay, i wanna do barbecue on my backyard with you, i wanna touch your hair smoothly, i wanna laugh with you, i wanna watching TV with you until you sleep on my shoulder, i wanna fight for you.  There's always a gambling on my life, but i don't like gamble my own feelings. And my feelings is real for you, my dearest bunny. God knows i loved her. and i hope she knows it too.

with love and your hair scent on my nose


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