Monday, June 19, 2017

Dizzy on the Comedown

                        Dizzy on the Comedown
                            by : Tanoko Prawira

There's several things that changed my whole live. My life maybe never be the same anymore if she walk away from my life, and i really mean it. Do you know how does it feels when your life felt so black and there's nothing to live anymore because you thought that you're already empty? i've been there before, when it happened to me i don't know what the hell i should do. But everything was changed when she walked into my life. Her smile makes my eyes glances again, i'm not over romantizing  something, but that's the fact. She let me in and i let her in, since that i knew that i still got a purpose to live my life, i have something to fight for, and it was my own happiness. i can feel my heartbeat again when she hugged me and whispered "I love you weirdo" and all those kisses that landed on my face. It's like landed on my favorite planet. And there's no reason why i should forsake god. Because god was so nice to me for letting me met her and getting know about her. The thing is, she's so special. I don't know what is the true definition of "Love" back then, and i got it now, for me, it's about two people supporting each other and giving their own affection in order to make both of them comfortable and happy. I'm happy with you, Mel. I really do, cause i could be myself when i'm with you, and that's the things i never found before. and about the hugs and kisses that you gave me, it makes the smile on my face getting wider everyday. Especially the first time we kissed, that's the moment i won't forget for my entire life. i can forget about something easily, but there's nothing i forget about you since the first time we met. I made a promise for myself, if someday she leave or someday we have to choose our own journey, there's always special place on my heart for her. She'll always be my bunny. there's some things i scared about, i'm afraid that i can't give her all the times she need with me, and i do afraid if someday there's a disappointment from myself to her. But in order to make things better i shouldn't think about that, instead i have to concentrate on my main mission, which is : To make her happy and comfortable with me. And i got rights for my own happiness, right? people said that happiness is real when you shared it with someone else, well they're right, thanks for making me human again, and thanks for coloring my whole life again, bunny :)
there's a bunch of things that i always missed from you, just like the way you played my hair, the way you hugged me, the way you see my eyes, the way you kissed my cheeks, the way you holds my hands, and the way you makes me calm.
I want to love you in a simple way, but with all my heart that goes by the time, and last longer than the lit of cigarette. You're always on my mind... you're on my dreams, you're so special on my eyes. I don't believe on romantic movie or novels, but i do believe that there's always a rainbow after the heavy rain. If you don't mind, let me take you on my adventure....where we can dancing under the moonlight without any doubts, and hold my trembling hands, you can follow my lead cause i know a place that can makes me calm, it was called "your hug" and allow me to protect you, and loving you through the finest hour of my life. so grateful that you walked besides me, a lover that can be my Bestfriend, a teacher, my moodbooster, my shelter when my spaceship broken, my kind of maple syrup for my pancake, and of course the chocolate on my life, and i promise I'll fight any obstacles for you, forever and always, I'll be your Mr.Weirdo :)

I love you, Imel.


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